Reflection

Christmas time just past and New Years is around the corner. It makes you think. I come back to the arrival of Christ. Joseph fell asleep and an angel appeared to him and he was first told about Jesus. The name Jesus means "Lord saves us" and as described in Matthew 1:21b "for he will save his people from their sins". I think how far away I am from being sin free. I want to strive to be so more perfect then I am. So more holy then I am truly. Recently I have been looking at people I know. There is a woman who is always happy, always giving. Where does she get the ability to stay so happy? To be always giving of herself? I think to myself that maybe I would be that giving if I had more time for myself. Maybe I would be more happy if.... I know that only Jesus is the one who could give us true happiness, can give us a never emptying bucket to give to others. How have I grown, that I haven't been overflowing yet? Instead I sit there and talk behind people's back about my disagreements. I stop helping people when I don't feels its mutual. Why help them, I got more to do.

Last October I have given my life to Christ for 9 years. I remember when I first devoted myself that I thought, wow 5 years, wow 7 years. You guys most be so close to God. You guys must be so holy. But I'm not there. I realize that it is something I constantly will strive for, something I will always try to accomplish but will fall short. As Paul said, "The law is good, then. The trouble is not with the law but with me, because I am sold into slavery, with sin as my master. I don't understand myself at all, for I really want to do what is right, but I don't do it. Instead, I do the very thing I hate." (Romans 7:14-15)

I'm so thirsty for more of God.


I’m so thirsty, I can feel it
Burning through the furthest corners of my soul
Deep desire, can’t describe this
Nameless urge that drives me somewhere
Though I don’t know where to go

Seems I’ve heard about a River from someone who’s been
And they tell me once you reach it, oh, you’ll never thirst again
So I have to find the River, somehow my life depends on the River
Holy River, I’m so thirsty

Other waters I’ve been drinkin’
But they always leave me empty like before
Satisfaction, all I’m askin’
Could I really feel this thirsty if there weren’t something more?

And I’ve heard about a River from someone who’s been
And they tell me once you reach it, oh, you’ll never thirst again
So I have to find the River, somehow my life depends on the River
Holy River, I’m so thirsty

I’m on the shore now of the wildest River
And I kneel and beg for mercy from the sky
But no one answers, I’ve gotta take my chances
‘Cause something deep inside me’s cryin’
"This is why you are alive!"

So I plunge into the River with all that I am
Praying this will be the River where I’ll never thirst again
I’m abandoned to the River
And now my life depends on the River
Holy River, I’m so thirsty

Listen to Thirsty by Chris Rice


I heard about the day You went away
You said You had to go prepare a place
And even though Ive never seen Your face
I'm missin You
I lie awake tonight and I watch the sky
And I wish it didn't have to be so high
Cause I'm belonging on the other side
And I'm missin You

Cause somewhere behind those stars
Is Someone who belongs to me
And I know in my deepest heart
Theres a place for You until I find the place You made for me
But still I'm missin You

I dream about Your promise to return
And I wake up hangin on Your every word
But for now my feet are planted here on earth
So I'm missin You
And even while they say that I'm a fool
I know you see me waiting here for You
Oh, and prayin that somehow You ll get here soon
Cause I'm missin You

Cause somewhere behind those stars
Is Someone who belongs to me
And I know in my deepest heart
Theres a place for You until I find the place You made for me
But still I'm missin You
Oh, I'm missin You
Lord, I'm missin You

Listen to Missing You by Chris Rice